How can I help?

If your friend is raped, here are some actions you can take:

Listen to her
Believe her. It is important for rape victims to know that people believe them. Few people lie about being raped
Thank her for telling you. Let her know that you understand how hard it is to talk about what happened
Support her and tell her that it wasn’t her fault. She did nothing to provoke the rape, and no woman deserves to be raped. The only person to blame is the rapist
Reassure her of her worth and express your respect for her strength as a victim of rape
Respect her decisions and allow her to make her own choices
Encourage her to make a police report and/or contact a women’s group such as the WCC to talk to a counsellor, or Penang Befrienders. Every woman’s reaction to abuse is different. Because of the powerful effect of emotions like shame, self-blame, fear and hurt, the abuse and its impacts need to be understood before recovery can begin. Confiding in an experienced counsellor in a women’s group can help. She doesn’t have to suffer in silence

Give support, comfort, and listen actively
Do not make assumptions about how the child feels
Always believe the child and let her know it; a child does not lie over such matters
Be specific and make positive statements. Do not blame the child for what happened. Let her know it is not her fault
Use language that the child uses and understands
Tell her she is right to tell and that she does not have to keep secrets that make her feel frightened or uncomfortable
Reassure her that she is safe and will be protected from further abuse
Allow purposeful expressions of feelings either verbally, through play, or drawings
If the child is being sexually abused by a member of her family or an adult close to the family, arrange for her a place of safety
Encourage the child to resume a normal life while allowing her to talk about the assault or abuse whenever she so wishes
Get medical attention for the child and report the abuse to the Social Welfare Department
Contact a local NGO or counselling service to help the child deal with the trauma of the situation

treating women with respect
educating the people around you by helping to dispel common “rape perceptions”. Rape is never the victim’s fault. Men should know that their violent behavior is not acceptable
neither making nor tolerating sexist jokes and comments about women
supporting the work of the WCC and other women’s organizations that are campaigning to stop violence against women